Elements or Lower

Fri, 14 Apr 2006

Notions I have entertained, however briefly

  1. If one were to put frozen prawns in a popcorn maker, one would obtain prawn crackers.

  2. By placing one’s textbooks in a blender and drinking the result, one could absorb the information contained therein through a process of homeopathic revision.

  3. Pimms and Vimto are the same product and should be considered entirely interchangable at middle-class barbecues.

  4. West Ham is merely an abbreviation of West Hampstead.

  5. That it might be possible to hurl an A-level maths textbook in such a way that each page would individually impact the face of the teacher, like a flickbook animation.

  6. Sidcup is a suburb of New Malden.